Tan..tananana Tanndoori Nights!!

This weekend is dedicated to a lot of gooooooood things(coming up soon)..but the most significant one is having had the pleasure of watching the much awaited and much hyped KARZZZZ..in Inox,back rows..with 3 tubs of popcorns,5 servings of French fries,some corn and cheese dumplings etc..etc(the etc was about all the in between the movie snacks to resist any shocks the movie may have provided)

And here are my random thoughts on the movie in no fixed order (sadly though ...I should have taken a notepad)

Dino Morea agreed to look like Himesh bhai in his next birth-he surely is either very daring or is having a terribly rough patch in life..!!Its ok Dino-we know you cant act for nuts.. and no one wants to give you movies…but then that’s no way of punishing yourself for something you cant help!!!

I did not know people of South Africa can be Crrrrazy about a guy who always wears open buttoned shirts n blazers in all this concerts..(Golden ones at that), has funnily weaved hair and an ugly stubble, pouts when he smiles. and sings hindi songs with a constant one expression on his face- anger!

Himani shivpuri must have been totally shaken to have played pseudo mother to a guy who is almost her age! Probably thats why she vents out the frustration by calling him”sone ke ande dene wali murgi”-(murga hi bol deti yaar)

Himesh looks more like the care taker of Raj Babbar than vice versa(talk about a sad adopted child!!)

The best friend who meets Monty after ages(or atleast that’s what is shown) looks like a total loser(and acts like one too) is actually a doctor(Whoa!!he knew that his friend would be needing him!!best friends there—listening??)

Tina comes from a catering school on a final assignment when she meets Monty for the first time-why the heck does she have to leave even before people have eaten!!

Why is the random girl in the party clicking Tina’s pictures when she thinks that the song was for her n not Tina?

Monty composes his songs on a Mac book sitting on the pool side amongst bikini babes! Talk about inspiration!

This is one technology savvy movie-Ravi Verma goes meeting her mother in a glider,Kamini murders Ravi verma by loosening the fuel tank of the glider and jumping off the parachute( aila..that’s not even a full murder!!),and sir Jooda has a digital speaking arm through which he communicates to his translator…PHEW!!

I did not know Monty was an explosive man-he burnt the entire glider with the touch of a half inch of his black t shirt!!

Monty’s mother surely gives away some emotionally high moments in the movie when she turns up after the plane crash dressed up in heavy make up and vents her anger on the kali maa(“tujhe meri mamta ka karz chukana hoga!!,tune meri kokh banjar kari hai..tujhe mera karz dena hoga…!!kaisi maa hai tu!!!)-I had tears in my eyes..o was laughing like a maniac obviously to have received the i-will-kill-you looks from Himesh loyalists!

Each and every character, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in Karzzzz have the best anti-aging and anti fattening cosmetics at their disposal. You are helpfully given ‘then and now’ transitions of brand ambassador Urmila Matondkar as proof.And believe me theres not even the slightest difference even after 25 long years!! None of the characters manage an extra wrinkle, or an extra inch. I want whatever they are having!I want..I want..I want!!!

I can understand the part where Urmila does not remove Dino’s huge picture from her bedroom wall even after she has known the her husband has been reincarnated to Himesh-Talk about the shock of having a husband like Dino to have transformed to Himesh-poor thing..must have thought…kaash itna bura accident na krwaya hota…shayad shakal sudhar ke aati is janam mein bhi!

I did not know 50 year old women could drive the glider and attempt murder at the same time with such finesse

Tina is such an important person in the story line…after all our man is completely and unquestioningly smitten by her and goes all the way to Kenya to find her… It must be some sort-of an art to make the object of ‘true love’ a bystander whose primary function is to lick ice-creams and go on a soft toy fetish. She just exists. Damn, she doesn’t even bother to offer support when the man of her life has disclosed the inner turmoil he’s going through!

I am wondering on whats wrong with Shweta(a.k.a Tina)-is it that her eyes don’t suit her face..or her face not suiting her eyes??

Why does Monty faint like a woman everytime he encounters a shock…and how is it that he makes sure he drops slowly and at the right angles without getting hurt..

Masha-Alla CANT EVER BE Dard-e-dil…but then I guess we can give the credit to the people involved in the song here..For the beauty of Dard e dil we had the ever amazing Rishi Kapor and for the horror of Masha Allah-we have our very own Himesh bhai and his oh no girl friend…!!!

Indra kumar is a gutsy man.After giving Madhuru Dixit some of the biggest hits for her career-he had the daring to lauch his daughter with Himesh bhai…no no..not as his daughter…but his girl friend!!

Monty was supposed to narrate the story of his love with Kamini through the final song-ek Haseena thi…I was still looking for one till the end!!

I didn’t know of the pouting talent of Urmila-though she had the toughest competition from Himesh here…

She looks equally old if not more even after 25 years!!!!!

I did not know Himesh bhai was just 25 years of age..!!

And through it all the USP of the movie remains the wonderful,magnificent and superbly laudable song Tandoori Nights-I don’t know what is more amazing in the song-the competition of pouts between Himesh and Urmila,the sassy (read”crappy”)dance moves or the love for the club-Himesh bhai kudos to you-Club itna acha laga ki poora gana uspe likh daala!!!!

While I was throughly enthralled(read-traumatized) in this master piece through every bit,I had Vin and Shivani who couldn’t bear this piece of art…so much so that after the hangover of 5 pints beer each and the movie-they were found sleeping till 4 pm the next day..while Shivani has threatened to end all relations with me for emotionally blackmailing her to watch the movie with me..Vin has gone quiet and numb..and all he can do when he hears the Himesh songs is shriek in agony n pain…Himesh bhai.. now this is whats totally “Aapka suroooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooor”!!


P.S:-As we got up from our seats after the movie was over,I saw a man sitting on the other side of the rows..i guess he had fainted..and his friends were trying to bring him back to senses..I just hope that wasn’t the movie’s impact…or else my friends n vin will surely disown me some time soon for putting their lives in danger!


But truly,frankly,honestly speaking..if you are suffering from a problem of not having laughed like nuts…and need a therapy…GO FOR Karzzzz…it may have been promoted as a vengeance based thriller.. but to me it worked better than any other laugh riot claimer...and as of now..im still facing the after effects of The hilarious comedy i watched over the weekend...!!